Reflections: Random Generator Pageview Tracking

During December, I modified all of my random generation processes to track when results were generation. I wanted to determine which generators were used more frequently so I could enhance the popular ones and rework those with limited interest or just toss into the bit-bucket. Like many people, I use Google Analytics as one of the core metrics for site statistics.

Since December was the cut-over month, I chose the periods just prior and just after too look at the overall results. The early period includes the months of October and November (61 days). The latter period covers January and February (60 days). Both periods include a major holiday. Generator initial page views were tracked in Oct/Nov but only for the initial page view. Jan/Feb includes stats for every page generated as well as the initial page view.

The site wide statistics are quite revealing:

Oct/Nov: 68% Bounce Rate, 5360 Page views, 1.93 pages/visit, 1:45 minutes on site, and 73% of visitors were new.

Jan/Feb: 31% Bounce Rate, 70732 Page views, 7.26 pages/visit, 5:26 minutes on site, and 79% of visitors were new.

The overall page views increased 10-fold. Some of that is due to natural growth. Mostly, the analytics reports just didn’t capture the multiple generator page loads due to the nature of my coding approach. The raw web server statistics indicated those loads but it is nice to have the information in a singular location.

The reduction in bounce rate and increase in retention time also told me the generators were as useful as I expected. Nice to see my assumptions were valid. Now onward to 2K pageviews per day. Such a lofty goal is going to take some time.

Word Search – Fantasy Words

Amusing myself…one day at a time.

Word Search -Fantasy Words #1

Download (PDF, 16KB)

Enabling Page View Monitoring for AJAX Pages

Turns out it is pretty simple. I probably should have looked at doing so months ago. Trivial bit of javascript to go along with the ajax event. The results…speak for themselves.

The simplicity is:

_gaq.push([‘_trackPageview’, ‘virtual page name’]);

The Phantom ‘Mithril Mage’

Over the last few months, I have been getting increasing numbers of people visiting based off ‘mithril mage’ as a search term. The first time I saw it mentioned was kesher’s post on the odd74 forums. Since it is becoming increasingly popular, I decided to go with the flow.

The hostname, mithrilmage.com has been registered and will point to the mithrilandmages.com domain. Quick and simple. It is a bit shorter for those who still type in urls. People like me. The shorter domain should be available within 48 hours as the update progresses to the various domain servers.

The label inspired me. So I used it to inspire someone else. The results should launch sometime in 2012.

Oh my, I’m headed to prison

Back in June, I posted a commentary on FM 999-3 Counter Zombie Operations at the Fire Team Level. The field manual is a humorous take on procedures for an army fire team dealing with a zombie outbreak. Other than the cover, the work is obviously not a real field manual.

Today, I was informed not once but twice that I was violating federal law and was going to go to jail. No, not jail, I’m apparently heading to the Federal Pen. At least according to this fellow.

The first contact was a comment on the original article by dead man walking. The moniker makes me wonder if he isn’t one of the undead trying to thwart the distribution of the manual. Probably not, but he does have his underwear in a knot.

It was listed that a hard copy of FM-999-3 was available on this site. Obviously another lie. Production of any manual that “looks” authentic still is punishable by Federal law. That means 10-20 in prison for you morons who think this is all some game. You can not print anything that is marked as being from any Department of the Military without prior approval.. I work for the Army and have informed my superipors of this print and they will follow-up with proper recourse action.

Apparently I lied before lying. Very confusing. There is a quoted link to a hard-copy distribution site from the manual. However, it doesn’t lead to any location that distributes a dead tree variant. I’m unsure about the original fib. I suspect he was easily fooled and thought the work was more than it appeared. Humor is a dangerous beast. Hopefully his superipors [sic] possess a sense of humor.

This fellow has time on his hands. Posting the comment was not the end. He also hit my contact page and delivered an email. Again, he was dead man walking with an email address of widow.maker54@. After some thought, I discarded the notion he was the 54th zombie that only attacks married men. I want to believe he has strange predilections but based on all the lore I cannot comprehend the undead filling out a contact form. Yep, I’m slow on the uptake because he probably couldn’t post a comment either if he were dead. Unless he is one of those oddball smart zombies. Could be. More threats were delivered in the contact email:

All who are responsible for production of the FM-999-3 will and can be punished by Federal laws. It is NOT permissible to print ANY form of Military/Government manual/writings without the prior approval from that Department. Anything produced can be punishable by Federal Law. What you think it’s a”hoot” to do this? And it’s alright to make anything for a laugh? Well when you are sitting in a prison cell I’d like to see who is laughing then.

Federal Pen. Check. Not permissible. Check. Underwear wrapped around his left testicle cutting off brain cells. Check. Obviously he can read because he referenced the word hoot. I used it in the post. (Sadly, this is another strike against him being undead.) Reading doesn’t equate to comprehension. I want to respond to the email. First I need to work through all his points.

All who are responsible for production of the FM-999-3 will and can be punished by Federal laws.

Response: You need to reread what I posted. I’m not responsible for the production of FM-999-3. Why would I provide a bunch of links that don’t generate traffic to my site? The inter-tubes have this cool utility to check ownership of domains. Not to mention, if I were that witty, I would have stated ownership. I didn’t.

It is NOT permissible to print ANY form of Military/Government manual/writings without the prior approval from that Department.

Gotcha. I’m certain the original authors didn’t print it. Or claim it was a Military/Government manual. Sorry, widow.maker54, you cannot even get a copy of it here. It’s not mine (see above).

Anything produced can be punishable by Federal Law.

Check. You covered that in the first sentence. Are you sure you aren’t undead? Wait, maybe you work in the Department of Redundancy Department. They have cool t-shirts. You can buy nice knock-offs far cheaper. Wait, I got off track.

What you think it’s a”hoot” to do this?

Yes. Congrats on using the word hoot. Hoot is a difficult word to work into written materials. Very uncommon in conversation. Except when you are discussing owls.

And it’s alright to make anything for a laugh?

Not anything. Multiple subjects are off limits. I could not cross the line to mock the carnal sex lives of vampires. Unless they bother to fill out the contact form telling me its okay. I might wet myself if they do. However, dead but-not-undead man who walks, I did not make anything to make people laugh. You’ll have to track down the guy who wrote it. (See above).

Well when you are sitting in a prison cell I’d like to see who is laughing then.

So you are going to come visit? Shouldn’t we start as pen pals first? Having never been in prison, I think we need to work through the bureaucracy of visitation rules first. If you think I’m going to approve you for conjugal visits, you need to pull back on the reins. I’m not that easy.

I do wish you luck in sending your superiors (turns out you spelled that wrong) after me. I’m going to go mate with a friendly succubus. She promised she would visit me in prison.

I look forward to corresponding with you further. You may want to adopt a different moniker. Dead Man Walking makes you sound incarcerated for horrible crimes like pointing to satirical works. Not to mention widow.maker54. If you are looking for impact, being #54 doesn’t cut it. You seem like a low-level assassin whose about to get his ass kicked. The use of a hotmail address was top-notch. Nothing portrays authority more than a free email service.

Are you sure you want to do that?

Dread words, for certain. The game master is giving you an out because the outcome is grisly. The brain starts to spin. Are there details I overlooked? Did I miss an important action?

Its something I’ve heard a lot when I choose actions that are not the best action strategically or for long time survival. Frankly, I see those actions as character personality. When it fits, things go to shit. Unless it goes against pure instinct for fight or flight, actions are open.

Most people do not make intelligent choices in the heat of battle or when they are exposed to extreme situations. The heritage and history of the character should bleed through. It’s not like characters kick back, think about the situation for a few minutes and plot how to deal the most damage while minimizing risk.

Characters are people, under duress, with little time to think. They choose in the blink of the eye and react. Not every character can be a battle hardened warrior. Even under extreme circumstances, actions don’t make rational sense. How many medals are given out for sane decisions in the heat of battle?

Meat Shields: Epic Meal Time Style

The Epic Meal Time folks crack me up. The latest instalment features the cooking of a meat shield. If it featured someone hacking the guy up with a sword rather than the Russian drilling holes into with a rifle, it would be a perfect demonstration of the fate awaiting many hirelings and henchmen.

Dead henchmen aren’t nearly as tasty. You could also eat your armor if you run out of rations. No more dried beans. Yum.